Holy. Shit. Please feel free to tune out right now if you aren't, in fact, a 100%, Scissor Sisters-humming, musical-theater-loving, Chris Colfer-adoring, gold-star gay. Even if you are you might find what we're about to share with you an atrocity of epically gay proportions. But in case you missed it, on last night's Glee, Sarah Jessica Parker returned (as Kurt's Vogue editor boss Isabelle Kempt), along with Shangela and Ana Matronic, to have a kiki with Kurt and Rachel in a New York loft. Hearing SJP do the "and by bitch I mean this rain" line made us kind of screw up our face with discomfort, but anyway, wow. Then Rachel leads some gals in a quick rendition of "Turkey-Lurkey Time" (our favorite fucked up holiday song ever, by far), because why not. We're pretty sure about half of gay America fell off their couches last night and either died or cried. See it below.