Hot Male Model of the Week: Pavel Navotny

This is, hands down, the hottest photo of a shirtless dude we have stared at in many moons. That semi he's got there (which may not even be a semi) made us fall off our chair. Good god. Will we ever touch anything so hot without paying for it? Probably not. But a boy can dream. [Gay HUNK]

Update: How silly of us. That is, of course, Bel Ami star Pavel Navotny, and this is a still from a video called Pavel Navotny's Water Games. More NSFW goodness below.

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Please Enjoy This Video of 'Twilight' Actor Bronson Pelletier Pissing in an Airport

Bronson Pelletier, whom we believe is gay (he was recently arrested at Gym Bar in WeHo for public intoxication), is kind of a problem drunk! The actor who portrays Jared in the Twilight franchise got kicked off a flight just before Christmas for being too drunk. Then he proceeded to whip out his peen and piss all over the gate area while a number of onlookers watched, and recorded the whole thing. Sadly TMZ's video blurs out the peen, but here you go. [TMZ]

Photo Of John Hamm's Dong Goes Viral

Click to enlarge. Photo: Splash News via VH1John Hamm likes to go commando. There is, in fact, a whole Tumblr devoted to this fact called John Hamm's Wang, because you can often partially make out his not inconsiderable man parts through his pants in photos. Today, Gothamist has even gotten into the game with a new photo that they were shocked to believe might not be photoshopped. It looks like a few wrinkles in his khakis were smoothed out, but the wang is all his.

Oh, and this is another nice one too. We're jealous of that wife of his. [Gothamist via VH1]

We Don't Care What You Say, Henrik Rummel's Unit Is Huge

By now, if you're a homosexual, you've surely seen this photo of American rower and bronze medal-winner Henrik Rummel, who officially has given Bjorn Barrefors a run for his money for the prize of Tastiest Bulge at the Olympics. (Sidebar: We kind of love how this Olympics has been ALL ABOUT the perving over bulges, swimwear, and male ass, as aided by Facebook and everyone's obsession with discussing everything on the internet, and it's way more pronounced than it was in '08. But we digress.) Gawker posted this pic yesterday, insisting that Rummel was sporting an erection as he accepted his medal alongside his less well endowed teammates. But no, as of today, with the entire internet drooling over his junk, Rummel insists he was not hard. That enormous thing is just his flaccid penis, and he points it upward like that because why? Because it's huge.

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51 Ways To Say Penis

Oozing Whistle, anyone?

Porn Hack Plagues Facebook With Unwanted Penises, Most Gays Remain Amused

You know how that friend of yours who's always posting pictures of hot, semi-naked men on his Facebook wall is always the one getting the most Likes and comments? Yeah, well, it appears some clever hackers have gotten a few ideas, and the usually chaste Fbook is now littered with porn, including this hot young gentleman to our right (and some lady parts, and some bloody skulls and things too). Among the comments on the picture-post (this one stems from this clearly fake account, which has already been coopted by assholes trying sell used Blackberries), are such gems as "Dude my 9 year old just saw this. Say it ain't so," and "whoever posted this pic...if ti isnt a virus kudos for posting it.....if it is a virus, kudos to the creator of it.."

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Prehistoric Men Pierced, Tattooed Their Penises

Well whaddya know. According to a study in The Journal of Urology, "Phallic decoration became prevalent among men of the Magdalenian culture in France and Spain about 12,000 years ago." The researchers figured this out by studying phallic art -- basically hand-held penis scultptures (dildos?). "The pieces, researchers say, frequently mirrored what actually appeared on the male penis. Paleolithic art is known to be very naturalistic, so the artists were recreating what they saw." [Discovery News]

Thomas Jane Finally Showed His Wang on 'Hung'; Also, There Will Be a Gay Trick In His Future

Finally, last week, Thomas Jane's character on Hung showed a bit of his lengendarily large penis (sadly we missed this because our satellite's been out). SuperheroFan has the NSFW shots, which only includes a quick but girthy cock-top-shot.

Also, in trying to court some more gay viewers, Hung will FINALLY feature a gay john for Jane's character -- because it's SO believable that he'd be a hustler with an exclusively female clientele. The gay story arc, featuring actor Jamie Clayton as a new client, starts on Sunday, November 6. [Queerty]

Guy With Huge Bulge Solves Rubik's Cube in 2 Minutes

Did they do this on purpose? I mean. Come on. This kid's boner seems to get even harder around the 1:30 mark, as he gets closer to solving the cube. [via Lady Bunny]

You Must Be This Long to Ride

Is there anything we won't use to try and prove the size of our dicks?  Feet, hands, arms....

According to a new study, the shorter your index finger (second finger) is to your ring finger (fourth finger), the longer the length of your penis.  Pause here while you look at your hand and try to adjust your fingers so that your index finger is as short as possible....go ahead, we'll wait.

Additionally, the same ratio is thought to be an indicator of alcohol use and alcoholism, as well as an indicator of possible prostate cancer (the longer the finger, the smaller the risk) and autism.

Wonderful World of Sperm

Today we answer the age-old question, "How long can sperm live on a toilet seat?" [via Unicorn Booty]

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Penis Piano

This would be from Greece Has Got Talent. We assume they're hard?

Antonin Scalia Likes 'Em Uncut

You may have heard about the internet how San Francisco's Board of Supervisors are looking to ban the practice of circumcision in the city for anyone under the age of consent, 18. The idea has infuriated some Free Speech advocates, because it hinders religious people from performing an act they believe in. Well, it turns out that conservatives like Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia are not going to overturn such bans because the Court has been slowly eroding many protections of religion -- not to mention that Scalia basically hates the First Amendment, and thinks it's used way too broadly. So hear ye, hear ye, Scalia likes 'em uncut (or so says one constitutional law professor). [Daily Beast]

Crack Found Up In One Inmate's Penis

Guards at Louisville Metro Corrections found a baggie of crack hidden up inside a dude's foreskin. We're guessing that was a whole lotta foreskin, and that he's done this before.

Kentucky prisoner Antoine Banks (pictured) had to submit to a strip search after a baggie of coke was found in the waistband of his underwear. The crack, you see, was much better hidden. Banks was originally arrested for possession, when a routine police stop turned up salvia and codeine in his car.

In barely related news, Miley Cyrus regrets smoking salvia.

One Man's Premature Might Be Another Man's 'Just Right'

Erectile dysfuction, which seems to affect anywhere between 15 and 30 million men, is actually an umbrella term for a number of issues including various degrees of impotence, priapism, premature ejaculation, and weird-shaped penises. As the Book of Odds points out, premature ejaculation can be hard to define as well, since what "premature" is really depends on the preferences of those involved, and one man's "premature" may be another's "just right." (We ourselves get bored with sex that drags on and on... we have TiVo to catch up on, etc.)

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Indonesian Police Barred from Penis Enlargement

The most shocking part about this Reuters piece about how police officers in Indonesia's Papua state are banned from enlarging their penises isn't the headline itself. It's the fact that, as you read on, you learn that there's this local custom for penis enlargement that involves wrapping one's cock in "gatal-gatal" leaves (from something known as the "itchy tree") so that it swells up "like it has been stung by a bee." Um, gross!! [via Unzipped]